scariest day of my life

let me start by saying thank GOD that my baby is doing better!!:)

with that being said let me tell u about the scariest day of my life. I wake up Friday morning and Parker (my 4yr old) wasn't acting like himself so i figured he wasn't feeling well. I took his temp it was 95.5 which is a little low but I wasn't to concerned. that is until I tried to pick him up and he was sooooo lethargic that we was like a big noodle so I decided to take his rectal temp (I know I'm a horrible mommy...lol) and it was only 92.1 which is technically hypothermic so we rushed him to the hospital. when we got there the nurse took his temp again and she immediately rushed us to a room and within 10mins there was about 8-10 people in there doing something with my baby. after an hour or so the doctors decided he needed to be transferred to a childrens hospital. he was going to be medivaced out but weather was bad so they sent an ambulance and we proceeded to drive the longest two hours of our lives. as soon as the doctors said we were being transferred to UNC Chapel Hill and being put in ICU I almost burst into tears but I looked at my hubby and he turned ghost white and looked like he was gonna pass out so I knew I had to stay strong and listen to EVERYTHING the doctor was saying. he said my baby was in a "metabolic crisis". for those of u who don't know Parker has a mitochondrial disease called complex 1 definiency. which affects his metabolic system! so the doctors said they didn't know y his temp was sooooo low cuz all the tests they ran came back fine except his blood sugar was a little low. so they think he either had a seizure or it was just that his sugars were off. when we finally arrived at UNC (at 1115pm) Parker was put into ICU for observation. we only had to be there over night because he was starting to act like his normal self again. he is now in a regular room but we will be here a few more days for further testing to determine exactly the cause of his low temp! we have only been here since late Friday night and he has already had a EKG, EEG, and ECHO! we have a MRI and swallow study scheduled for tmrw. will be meeting a bunch of specialists sometime in the couple days to see if anyone can find out the best way to treat out baby!

he gave us and the docs a real scare on Friday but thank the Lord he is going to make a full recovery!

i hate being sick:(

it is summertime and who wants to be stuck in the house b/c they r sick..not me...but i am! my head is hurting sooooo bad (i cant see straight), i cant breathe (very well), im coughing like crazy (feel like i might hack up a lung) but i HATE going to the doctor so im hoping i get better on my own and soon (wishful thinking im sure)!! i really would love to be able to just go to bed and sleep for an entire day and then maybe i would feel better but everytime i lay down i start coughing...ugh!! oh well i guess if im not willing to go to the doctor then i should just stop complaining!!!

im going to the beach tmrw and saturday regardless of how i feel!! the beach always makes u feel better...right??

deployments suck

i hate when my friends or family are sad and today one of my dear friends is having to say goodbye to her love. i know from experience that that is one of the hardest to do. that is by far the worst part of being a marine wife! we are soooooo proud that they fight for our freedom but HATE to say goodbye!:( i know how you're feeling B and i hate that you are sad! i love you and am here for you! i know i keep saying that but i dont want you to forget it! i know we havent been friends very long but i consider you one of my best friends (u too T....lol) and i know we will be friends for life!! you are one of the strongest people ive ever met and i know u will get thru this! just remember its ok to cry, its ok to be sad and its even ok to be mad!!!

maybe im just being selfish....

i have some good news and some bad news! good news is my hubby got baptized on sunday and the bad new is i wasnt there to witness it:( i am soooooo happy for him and the decisoin he has made (i was baptized when i was 14ish) but i wasnt there for him and it makes me worry that maybe he doesnt love me as much as i love him. i know that sounds silly but i feel like that is something u share with the ones u love and i was at home with a migraine. i didnt understand y he couldnt just wait til i was there. maybe im just being selfish idk! but i cant shake the feeling of "maybe he really doesnt love me anymore". i hate feeling this way because i have no reason to. he told me he wished i was there but it was a last minute decision and even if he would have called me there is no way i would have made it. and i think that is what hurts the most...knowing he had at least 10 mins to get ready and he didnt even call or text me to let me know what was happening and then let me decide if i was feeling good enough to go. i would have liked to get some pictures and be the first to congratulate and hug him. but instead i was the last to do those things and that hurts:( today is our 9yr anniversary and i shouldnt be feeling like this. he tells me all the time how much he loves me and would never leave me and he is proud to call me his wife so y cant i believe him? im sure its just my self esteem talking. i know he could do soooooooo much better then me and that scares me.

well i guess im just being selfish and i need to realize that when God is speaking to u.....u listen!!:)

i know i only have 2 followers (i love u 2 for following...lol) and im sure everything i blog about u already now but thnx for letting me vent!!!:)

pics pics pics

we just got home from our littlest hero pictures!! we had a great time and the kiddos did pretty good!! i know we got some really cute shots of our lil hero!! especially after miss B came and cheered him up!! he sure does love her!!:) cant wait to show pics when we get them!!! thanks again B for finding this awesome program!!!

im super excited!!

well today was a much better day!! im am super stoked and thankful that we are getting family pictures on monday!!! thanks to my friend B they will be free of charge!! she found this amazing website that offers families with special needs children family photos for free!! i have been wanting to get some new pics for awhile but havent had the money so now i can check that off my list!!:) cant wait to get them done! hopefully all the my kiddos especially parker cooperate!! we will be going to a park and getting some really great shots...i hope!! thanks again B!!! :-)

on the verge of tears:(

i have been on the verge of tears the last couple days and i have no idea why! before u ask no i am NOT preggers!!:) idk whats going on! i wish i knew how to fix it but i dont! it might be this headache that ive had for 11 days or our money situation or knowing i have family visiting soon and i have to clean the house or it might be knowing my daughter is leaving for the summer in a couple weeks i dont know what it is but its really starting to get on my nerves! maybe i just need a really good cry to make me feel better! well since i dont have an answer to why i feel the way i do im off to bed maybe that will help!! night night!!!